Lexie-Rose - The cracks in my mirror
My sister called me a vampire
when i was younger
because of how often i would avoid mirrors
as if nothing would show up
as if it would kill me
the accusations he didn’t stop there
as i got older, still avoiding mirrors
and staying inside with an oversized hoodie
vampire! vampire! stay away!
why did i avoid mirrors
avoid the light
remove myself from every situation
so that i was present, but not there. not seen.
why.
and so i rise
standing in front of the mirror i so often avoided
and lift my head
and stare.
the eyes. the face. the scars.
i notice everything
every tiny imperfection
everything that makes me hide
it’s not long
a mere few second of staring
before i crack.
strange, isn’t it?
mirrors are supposed to be the ones who crack
but as i raise my hand up to my face,
i feel the cracking, the crevasses left behind
as i return to the darkness.
away from mirrors
away from sunlight.
i’m not a vampire
that’s perfectly clear
but maybe i’ll pretend i’m one
until i’m ready to face the woman in the mirror.